Friday, May 20, 2011

Confessions....

I have been reading a lot of "confession" types of blog posts lately and I thought, why not join em!

So here goes...in no particular order....

-While this was originally supposed to be a food blog...I find myself too in love with my baby to blog about much else.  I still love to cook...but I love my baby much more!

-I fell in love slowly with Lucy.  I still look back on it with a bit of confusion.  When they put her in my arms I didn't have that overwhelming "LOVE" feeling everyone talks about.  Don't get me wrong, I loved her for sure.  But it just took me some time to fall deeper and deeper in love with her. And now...I would quite simply be lost without her.

-I also fell more in love with my mom after having a baby.  While those words are not said often enough....I find my mom, now more than ever, to be one of the most incredible women I know.  And, she's funny too!

-I still feel huge disappointment in myself that I was unable to nurse Lucy.  I know everything worked out the way it should, but I hear women talk about nursing their babies and I get a deep pang in my heart.  Oh well.....

-And yet, at the same time I am secretly glad it did not work out as I was able to get a small amount of relief from the hubby when he helped with a night feeding.

-I had NO idea how hard the first 8 weeks of bringing home a baby would be.  Lucy was a calm, mellow baby in my womb...and the exact opposite out in the world.  But our sweet gal has calmed down and, with sleep, this mama can handle so much more now!

-I always wanted a boy and a girl and now after having Lucy, well I just want more girls!

-I also always said, "Two kids and I'm out!" ....and now....well, let's just say I am happy to leave the door WIDE open for more :)  Pat is not as on board with this as I am....

-While I am a terrible food blogger, I could read food blogs all day long.

-A new marriage, a new baby, and only 40 minutes of sleep a night can make for rough waters at times. 

-When I read other people's blogs I find while most times I just simply enjoy reading them (i.e. stalking them) there are times that it just leads to pure jealousy.  Sometimes I end up wanting what other people have and get a bit pouty.  I really dislike that side of myself.  And then remember that my life is pretty darn great and I need to appreciate what I do have.

-Sometimes I play with the idea of running a mini-marathon.  This is often before I run each night....that thought never crosses my mind while I am actually running!

-I have found that I really, REALLY like to be the one in control of certain situations.

-I have a cocktail just about every day.  Normally an ice cold beer, but sometimes a glass wine is so lovely too!

-I tend to watch a lot of tv which makes my husband crazy.  Mostly it's stuff I taped on my DVR since weeknights are a bit hectic.  Hey-I like my shows!

-I have about a billion receipts in my purse that I have yet to deduct from my account.  Pat would never be ok with this sort of thing.  This is exactly why Pat and I have separate checking accounts! And a much happier marriage as a result!

-During the winter months or on really windy days I totally wish they still offered "full service" options at gas stations.  I would TOTALLY be willing to pay a bit extra to not have to get out of my car in the freezing cold to pump gas.  A task I could totally do without!

-And finally....I truly realize that I am blessed beyond belief to have such an amazing, sweet, wonderful, lovable, pistol of a baby girl, a great husband, dog, family and friends!

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